An Unexpected Visitor

I do not really know where to start!  I had a two day holiday with the two girls living in the house next door.  It was an odd sort of holiday and I had to share it with two wonky dogs.  Vincent only has one ear and the other one, Frankie, has funny legs that the girls had put a bandage on.  He had obviously been naughty because he had to wear something the girls called a "Bad Hat".  Everyone kept saying how cute he was but I thought he looked rather silly, like he was wearing a lampshade on his head.  I sort of played with them for a bit but they are not really my type, they know NOTHING about the games I normally play and did not even know what a pair of knickers were!  They were a bit goody two shoes.  When "her indoors" came back to get me I was so happy to see my gang again, Blondie was a bit cross because I got to go on holiday and she didn't, I knew she was upset because she bit my ear.  Chloe was understandably overjoyed to see me and we immediately set about playing.  Strangely, there are not many flip flops or knickers to be found and "her indoors" keeps mumbling about the lack of them.  I wonder what she has done with them all?

Frankie "Bad Hat"

"Her indoors" went out one afternoon and when she returned I greeted her in my normal fashion of leaping off the ground and hurling myself at her.  Then I had the shock of my life!  She had this THING with her.  A squeaky, long tailed THING that shouts louder than me when I want my dinner.  It demands attention all the time.  I do not know what it is, Blondie and Snake do not know either, Snake thinks the only way to find out is to eat it and Blondie tries to play with it but is a bit scared!  I am much braver and try to give it a good wash when I can, it's a bit smelly between you and I.  It bashes me on the nose with its hands and has the longest fingers I have ever seen.  I think it must be a baby because they bought it a teddy bear to cuddle,  I thought I could invent a new game to impress Chloe but "her indoors" got cross when I tried to run off with it (the teddy bear, not the THING).  I am a bit disgruntled to be honest, what does this THING think it is?  Coming in here wanting all the attention.  Everyone that comes to visit goes all silly when they see it.  I keep trying to show them how wonderful I am, especially now my coat is all shiny and sleek but they do not notice, I am going under the bed with a book to munch on whilst I hatch a plan.

What is that THING?

I got taken downstairs again to visit that needle man.  Sure enough, he stuck a needle in my bottom but I was not going to show I was scared this time so I retained a dignified silence.  I have to say that although I was reluctant to change, I can now see the benefit of this needle man, my coat is so beautiful and although I did not think it possible, I am even more handsome than I was.

Mr Handsome!

"Her indoors" is going to England.  What is England?  Not sure why she has to go or why she cannot take me but apparently some other women are going to come and live here and look after me, perhaps I can convince them that the only food I eat is sausages and flip flops?  Will be in touch again when she returns, I have to wait for her before writing again as I cannot get the hang of this keyboard.

Love and licks,

Fing
xxx