The Life Of Funny Fing: Bad Hats and Bad Noises

Happy New Year!

Well, everyone keeps saying it so it must mean something important. I have been incredibly busy so, as usual, finding time to write to you all has been difficult. I have been meeting more new friends and there have been lots of changes in my home. Him Over There has moved in next door, he is great because he is very forgetful, he is always leaving handy things around to be played with, phones, phone chargers, shoes and T-shirts. Snake has gone to live with some other people, Her Indoors goes to visit him but she says he is very happy and does not want to come back. Doc has moved in now, he is OK, very large ears though. He is equal to Chloe in the games department which is great. Her Indoors came back from England with a plentiful supply of knickers and flip flops so we have all enjoyed that, well, except for Her Indoors, she remains as grumpy as ever about our fun time. We have another guest in the house, Brian. Brian has a funny thing on his leg and he sometimes has to wear one of those “Bad Hats”, he crashes around and makes lots of noise with it and if I get too close then he hits me with it. Me and Chloe find it a bit scary and bark at it a lot, Brian thinks we are barking at him and gets a bit cross. Her Indoors seems to think Brian is more important than me because he is so sick and lets him sleep on the chair, so, to compensate for her misjudgement, I have been trying to get on to her bed at night. I am a lot taller than I was, just as handsome of course, but I cannot quite reach. Blondie, Chloe and Doc can all jump up there but even when I stand on tip toes I cannot get there. Hmmm, wonder if I will grow a bit more?

Brian without the Bad Hat and Big Eared Doc.

Pllleeeeaaaaassssseeee can I get on the bed?

It has rained here a lot over the last few months and sometimes when it rains, we get this horrid noisy thing happening. I do not understand what this thing is but when it happens I wish it would go away, all that banging and crashing and flashing lights. The first time it happened I panicked, I thought god had got cross and was coming to tell me off about all the knickers, flip flops and brushes I have got through so I hid under the sink. Her Indoors kept telling me it would be OK but what would she know, I was not coming out until it had gone away. Once again, Her Indoors seemed to find this quite amusing but she stopped laughing when I ate her new flip flops, they had a funny taste though so I only nibbled the toe a bit, Chloe finished them off.

Not coming out!

I have had to have more visits with the needle man, I try to like him and sometimes am quite pleased to see him but then he spoils it all by sticking them in me, I think he gets a thrill out of it so I am not going to let him know I do not like it. There are more naughty things in the clinic and they think life is just one big laugh, jumping all over me, they are furry and purry and Her Indoors loves them. I am not so sure, just like Boris they are very badly behaved and get through rolls of paper like they are going out of fashion. I growl at them when I see them in the hope they will go away - don't let this go any further but I find them a bit scary - it does not work though, they swing off my tail then run away laughing. Huh, I will think of a way to deal with them.

Furry, Purry, Scary Things!

We had something here called Christmas, did you get one? Her Indoors and Him Over There put some twinkly white lights up, they were lovely, very chewy though and it took Blondie and I quite a while to munch through them. We got there in the end though and were surprised when they were cross and kept going on about how we might have been “lectrified” but I do not know why they get so upset, they now have three lots of lights instead of one, they just do not get things these humans, no sense of adventure. Another new person has arrived now, Her Down There, she is in league with the needle man and put smelly stuff on my neck yesterday, she did bring chocolate though which smells great, if only I can manage to get some.........

Right, I am off to take part in the look out now, Doc, Blondie and I take it in turns to check the window, just in case any more monsters arrive.